Friday, September 19, 2014

Grandma - Say What????

I've lost track of the number of times Marc and I have had "the talk." I always figured it would be his dad that had the talk but nope, it was me. We talked STDs. We talked pregnancy. We talked love and marriage and babies and such.

I scared him. Do you want AIDS?

I explained. Pregnancy doesn't ruin your life but it sure makes it more difficult.

I took the high road. It's important to be a good boyfriend and eventually spouse.

I've shared my own struggles as a "too-young mom" - pregnant at 19, unwed.

I've been honest, straightforward.

And now I'm going to be a grandma.

My son is 18 and a senior in high school. His girlfriend is 18 and graduated in June. By the time he turns 19 and before graduation, he'll be a dad. She'll be a mom. And I'll be a 39 year old grandma.

Deep breath.

I'm not the first person in this situation but boy did I feel alone when he first told me. Of course, my initial thought was "Oh s$**" while my mouth said, "Ok, what's the plan?" Because really at this point, what else can I do? Support and love them.

And get excited. I always wanted to be a grandma (at like age 60). Instead, I will be a youthful grandma with lots of energy.

Now my role has changed a bit. Now I find myself reminding him of the responsible decisions. Don't call into work or school. You need to first, graduate and second, get to work. It's weird to guide a boy through pregnancy. It's not about how should he be eating and to keep exercising and to rest often. It's about offering support. Being a good boyfriend. Being there for her. Saving money. Making a plan.

In essence, I'm helping my son go from being a great man to being a great (basically) husband. And planning a wedding for next summer. Making room for momma to move in and baby eventually. Guiding. Mentoring. Teaching. And trying not to meddle (big surprise, I might be THAT mom).

So in essence, now that the shock has worn off. I'm thrilled. It's exciting really. It's going to be bumpy and rocky but it'll all be ok.

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